If I’m not a Bohemian I don’t know who is. Not only am I a playwright, but I spent several years living in the capital of Bohemia, Prague. I live and breathe my art, and anyone who knows me well will attest to me being a little socially unconventional at times. I don’t drive a
[An old grizzled FARMER drives his tractor along a dusty long road with tears welling up in his eyes. By his side in the front of the tractor is a very large pig, BETTY, struggling to cling onto life.] FARMER: Nearly there Betty! Nearly there! BETTY: Oink! FARMER: Just hold on Betty! BETTY: Oink! FARMER:
[A young TEENAGE BOY is standing underneath a hills-hoist Australian clothes line nervously about to undo a pair of knickers from the line. A middle-aged man appears from on the balcony of the household.] MAN: Oy! What are you doin’!? [The teenager freezes, like a deer caught in the headlights.] TEENAGE BOY: Nothing. Um… I’m
[A man, BARRY, in full English medieval attire and a crossbow slung across his back slowly approaches another MAN sat atop a small hill, dressed likewise, but with one shoe pulled off, and kneading his bare foot gently in his hands.] BARRY: Hail soldier! What ails thee? MAN: Shut up Barry. The reenactment’s over. BARRY:
[An Old English battleground, King Harold is engaged in a scuffle with a couple of Norman knights, but after dispensing of both of them takes a moment amid the surrounding skirmishes to briefly recover. A young English knight taps him on the shoulder. King Harold turns around to reveal a large arrow sticking out of
GROCER: Fresh tomatoes! On sale! Bright purple tomatoes! CUSTOMER: Purple? GROCER: Yes, bright purple, the way nature intended! CUSTOMER: I’ll take a bag please. THE END. via tumblr http://ift.tt/1ss5l20
[A man, MR. CARLISLE, steps into an empty elevator on the ground floor of a large corporate building. There are no buttons, but rather, a visual sound wave to represent a female ELEVATOR voice on a screen.] ELEVATOR: Good day Mr. Carlisle. MR. CARLISLE: Hello Elevator. ELEVATOR: Which floor would you like Mr. Carlisle? MR.
[A MAN dressed in a suit and holding a briefcase, stands waiting, checking his watch from time to time on stage left. WOMAN enters stage right.] WOMAN: Telephone? MAN: For me? WOMAN: No, you have one? MAN: A telephone? WOMAN: Yes. MAN: No. WOMAN: Oh. [A long pregnant pause.] WOMAN: Why don’t you have a
[A middle-aged man, MICK, approaches his friend, FRANK, who is sitting down in his living room softly sobbing. MICK sits down beside him and puts his hand on his back to comfort him.] MICK: Frank, why are you crying? FRANK: It’s… It’s… Audrey Hepburn! MICK: What about her? FRANK: I’m in love with her Mick!
[A MANAGER stands before a throng of employees in the office of a large call centre.] MANAGER: Good news everyone! The CEO has decided to outsource all of your breaks to India! EMPLOYEE 1: Breaks? But what does that mean? MANAGER: You know… you’re lunch breaks, toilet breaks, smoking breaks, sick leave. It’s all gone!