Illustration of a falling cat with toast tied to its back.

Jam On Cat


Toast pops up in the toaster. A young man, alone in the apartment, butters it and covers it with thick red jam.

A large orange tomcat walks into the room and stops for a moment to look at the man curiously as the man puts on a set of thick oven mitts. A Mexican stand off then …

A chase–

The man runs through the house, desperately pursuing the cat. He dives under chairs, jumps over furniture and finally catches it!

The man carries the cat to the kitchen. Thank goodness he’s wearing those mitts. He then proceeds to wrap the jam toast to the back of the struggling cat with great lengths of string, jam side up.

The man walks to the balcony, holds the angry cat on its side over the rails.


He breathes in deeply. Now he will know once and for all.

Sound of a door closing. The man turns around in alarm to see a woman behind him.

Sweat dripping.

WOMAN: Put Jeepers done, Jeff. Put Jeepers down.


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